There Is No Tomorrow
by starlightexpresso
Summary: When the line between imagination and reality is blurred, will Elena be able to find out where lies the truth? Or maybe she's not calling a spade a spade at all... Set after 2x22.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N:** First off, this is my first ff ever and also the first story I've ever written in English. It's not my mother tongue, so please forgive my grammar/vocabulary mistakes and point them out if you can (:

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><p><strong>EPOV<strong>

_I didn't know where I exactly was, but I could tell that it was some kind of old graveyard. There was fog everywhere and it was dark, I could only see few lanterns on the horizon, so I'd decided to follow the light and possibly find a way back home. I'd started to pass through the graves slowly and carefully, trying not to stumble. I'd been wandering like this for quite long, however, the light was still distant and it seemed like I hadn't moved at all. I was in panic. Lost and confused, I'd been running towards the street as fast as I could, only to get out of this place. I'd been about to give up, when suddenly, a ray of light bedazzled me for few seconds, until my eyes got used to it and I was able to tell a shape of a being standing right in front of me – human. I sighed in relief. I was about to smile at him, but then a person moved closer so I could see his face – a pair of hazel, bloody eyes gazing at me furiously, surrounded by a twiggy web of scarlet veins. The blood was dripping down his crimson lips, formed in an evil smirk. I opened my mouth in shock and tried to run away, but I didn't feel my legs. Then, a thrill ran down my spine, as I managed to say:_

_- Stefan…?_

- Shh, shh, it was just a dream! – I heard a soothing voice behind my ears, and when I looked up, I saw no one but Stefan, hugging me, trying to comfort. I smiled gently at him and closed my eyes.

- I know. It was just… so vivid, so real. Like a memory. – I whispered, still scared and confused.

I almost felt as Stefan's body straightened and lurched at these words, but he quickly went back to his previous position.

- Would you tell me what was it about? – he said easily, slowly, still rubbing my arm.

- Nothing special. I saw Jenna's death… but from my point of view. I was sitting on a backseat… You see, a typical nightmare. I don't really want to talk about it anymore. Can we just drop it? – I lied nervously, I didn't even know why I was lying to him. I felt guilty for doing it, but somehow I knew it was a right thing to do.

- Hmm, sure. If you want so. – Stefan mumbled and kissed my forehead.

- Thanks. – I said, smiling. – Hey, would you make me breakfast? I'm in a mood for something made by you. – I chuckled and he did the same.

- Ok. I'll go to the kitchen, then. Stay here. I'll be back in a minute. – he said and headed right to the kitchen in his supernatural speed.

As soon as he was gone, I quickly got down the bed and reached for a little diary which belonged to me. I had leafed through it until I found a blank page. Then, I looked around just to make sure Stefan wasn't in the room and started writing.

_Dear Diary,_

_It's been a month since my aunt Jenna's death and Damon's disappearance. Even though there is always loving and caring Stefan by my side, I still feel like something isn't right. Of course two important people in my life are gone, but somehow I know it's not it. Every day when I wake up in Stefan's arms, the ones that always surrounded me with security and love, instead of leaning to him I feel a need to run away. So I do the exact opposite – I lean closer, hug him and look into his lovely brown eyes. I try not to seek any evil spark in them and keep telling myself that all of my sudden, strange feelings towards him and these dreams, they're only a figment of my imagination._

I hadn't finished writing and hardly managed to hide a diary underneath the pillow when Stefan appeared in a room with a tray in his hands. I tried to act careless and happy like I'd been sitting in this position all the time, so I put a fake smile on my face, feeling nervous that this big grin might not look as natural as I wanted.

- A royal breakfast: scrabbled eggs, toasts and orange juice. Served right to your bed. – he smiled and put the tray next to me.

- Ummm, it looks delicious! Mr. Salvatore, you should be a cook. You've got a real gift, you know? – I said and he responded with a laughter.

- I'm glad you like it, Ms. Gilbert. Now, eat. You have to fill up a little. – he ordered, stroking my hair.

Even though the food tasted as delicious as it looked, I'd found it hard to swallow. I was absolutely starving, but I couldn't eat anything. All my thoughts turned to the dream I had this night – these scary eyes, the veins… the blood. Of course I'd seen Stefan in this state before, but it was still scaring the hell out of me. And the sight of blood… it'd always made me feel squeamish. And now, even a memory of it did.

I couldn't stand it no more, so I quickly got out of bed and locked myself in a bathroom. I didn't want to throw up in front of Stefan. I had to take a deep breath or few and pull myself together.

In a nanosecond I heard Stefan knocking at the door.

- Elena? What happened? Are you okay? – he asked, worried.

- Yeah… I've just… I've just felt squeamish and had to go to the bathroom. – I sobbed out.

- I hope it's not from the food?

- No, of course not. It tasted so good, really… It's just… I think I can't handle all these happenings from a month ago.

- I'm sure we'll find Damon soon…but, you know, he's still Damon. He may not want to be found. – he sighed, but somehow it didn't sound naturally.

- It's not just about Damon, Stefan. Even if we don't find him, he can still take care of himself. But… Jenna's and John's death, Jeremy's rehab, Damon's disappearance… don't you think it's too much? – I tried not to stutter while ticking off the names, but at the end of the sentence my voice broke.

Stefan sighed again. It sounded as if he didn't know what to say. Or he just didn't want to respond.

- Maybe I'll just leave you alone now. If you want to talk, I'll be at the patio. – he said, his voice followed by the sound of his footsteps. I covered my eyes and cried harder. I couldn't hide my tears any longer, I just let them flow. Inside my mind, I felt lost. I tried so hard to believe Stefan and tell him everything, I wanted him to ensure me everything's ok, but I couldn't do that. And, the worst part was, I didn't know why.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N:  
><strong>I didn't mean to publish the next chapter this quickly, but I'm currently ill and have some free time to spend. Writing is always more fun than yawning :) Anyway, THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU for all of your reviews, favs and subs! You can't even imagine how happy I am for them!

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><p><strong>EPOV<strong>

It took me about 20 minutes to finally calm down. I'd stopped shaking and crying – you could tell that, on the outside, I was perfectly fine. Inside my mind was a total mess, though.

I counted to ten and decided to confront Stefan. I stood up and reached a door handle. For a second I felt hesitation, but I pushed this feeling away, to the edge of my mind. This whole situation was totally hopeless. I shouldn't be afraid of the one I love, should I?

Poised and decided, I slowly opened the door and crept in the corridor. As I'd been walking through it, I felt an instant pang of guilt, as if the walls had been looking at me with such admonition. _Why are you doing this, Elena? Why are you hurting him, why are you hurting yourself? He loves you, Elena. Is this your regard of his love? _, I almost heard their voices ringing in my head, lashing me into fury. I wanted to contradict them, I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs, say it's all a lie, that I believe him unconditionally, love him unconditionally, and it won't ever change. And in the way I did. But nothing was that easy anymore.

I took the last deep breath before entering the patio. I couldn't chicken out now, no way.

- H-hey. – I muttered shyly after cleaning my throat. Stefan stood still, gazing at the woods pensively. I wondered what was he thinking about. After a second, he slowly turned his head to me. The smile on his face was tentative, yet peaceful. His gaze invited me in.

I took a few steps in his direction, this time unhesitating.

- Are you okay now? – he asked. His voice supposed to be caring, but somehow it held no emotions.

- I guess I am. And, I'm so sorry… I shouldn't have behaved like this. I… I have to face my problems myself. – I said, but it wasn't exactly what I meant. I knew I shouldn't make him worry about me, but somehow I wanted him to. I wanted him to hold my hand and press it to his soft cheek, I wanted him to look into my eyes deeply and with affection. I wanted to see the warm and love in his beautiful, brown irises, and I wanted the inner light in them to light up mine. I wanted him to hold my face in his hands and kiss me – long and passionately, just like he used to. But all I heard was:

"It's ok".

NO, IT'S NOT OKAY! I wanted to scream, to run, to cry out loud. I looked into his eyes, trying not to show the anger and irritation that was floating in me. They were dull. Lifeless and dull. As if he was blind. As if he wasn't really there. Yes, his body was, but his soul was somewhere else.

I looked at him more intensively, yet I couldn't keep my feelings back anymore. I was getting misty-eyed, it'd been just a matter of time until I shed my tears.

- Y-you… Y-you s-say itt's ok-kaay? – I sobbed out shakily. We stood in utter silence for few seconds. I wanted him to say something, but he answered nothing. Since when had he stopped reading my mind?

- No, it's not okay! – I screamed, just like I wanted to, and finally opened the floodgates. Not thinking much, I began to run back to the boarding house. As I was running, my vision became to blur – all the colors and shapes intermingled into whole and nothingness at the same time. My breathing was hard and shallow. My ears couldn't tell the sounds I heard, all I'd recognized through this brash sough were single words like "Elena, what, wait". But, even if I wanted to stop, I couldn't. My legs had been pushing me further and further until they became limp and I was flat on my back. I touched my aching forehead instinctively and felt a warm, gooey substance on my fingertips. All of a sudden, I heard a clear, long, evil growl from above.

And that was when I fainted.

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><p><em>I was in the graveyard again. The same damn graveyard I tried to escape from last night. The lanterns were still on the horizon, just where they supposed to be, but this time I wasn't going to follow the light, I knew it was pointless. I'd decided to stay here and let the dream – or whatever it was – go on. <em>

_Minutes passed, and they felt like the years. I was sitting on a gravestone, full of boredom, grubbing the dirt with a stick. Being able to see my breath, I assumed it was cold here, but – despite the flimsy T-shirt I was wearing – I didn't feel it at all. I sighed loudly and braced my chin with my hands. Such a boring dream._

_As soon as I thought it, I heard someone breaking through the curling branches of oak. When I took a glance at him, I saw a tall, handsome, raven-haired man in a leather jacket. Then I took a good look at him and saw the color of his mesmerizing eyes – icy blue. My heart had skipped a beat when I recognized him. _

_- Miss me? – he enquired alluringly, giving me his famous, cheeky smile. I couldn't help but smile back and run into him._

_- How could you ever doubt that? Of course I did! We both did! We… we had been looking everywhere for you, Damon! Where were you hiding? Why haven't you told us anything? Why had you left without saying goodbye? – I pelted him with questions, hugging him tightly, just to make sure he won't run away. I had truly missed him, he was my best friend. The sight of him made my heart fill with pure joy. _

_He inhaled my scent and closed his eyes peacefully. That was when I called it to mind: he was in love with me, and I didn't love him back. Yet I kissed him on his deathbed, thinking it was a goodbye kiss. But here he was, safe and sound, alive in my arms._

_- Maybe I… maybe I should step back. I'm not sure if you're comfortable this way. – I muttered shyly._

_- No, don't. I mean… it's fine by me. – he answered, and then cleared his throat as he began to say: - I hadn't left by myself, Elena. If I had a choice, I wouldn't have left you after all these things… _

_- What do you mean? – I interrupted him, confused. He looked at my breast as if he was searching for something that wasn't there, but should've been. I could tell he was angry and disappointed._

_- What are you doing? – I asked, even more confused than before._

_- Nothing, just searching for the tits, but I guess they're still missing? – he smirked. He was teasing with me again. I sighed. It was just Damon being Damon._

_- Oh God, it will be harder than I thought. – he mumbled under his breath. Then, he straightened his arms and intensively looked into my eyes. – Do you know what had really happened with all of us? With me, with Jeremy, Jenna, John…_

_- Of course I do. I still can't forget this gruesome sacrifice, your… let's say, "illness". – I saw a spark of hope in his eyes as his facial expression lightened. – But I still don't get why did you run away after us killing Klaus and Bonnie healing you? And why did Jeremy suddenly overdosed after the long abstinence? – At these words, the spark in his eyes turned into an angry one. _

_- What? – I asked, astonished. He was so mysterious now and I didn't like it.  
><em>

_- You were given false information, Elena._

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><p>Well, I do hope you won't kill me for this! :D Of course, reviews are love.<p> 


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